Sometimes I don my tinfoil hat and go read some really conservative websites. It’s terribly uncomfortable, and it’s usually pretty crumpled because I’m environmentally conscious and only use recycled tinfoil in my anti-mind control hat. Don’t worry, I’m not going to describe what I’m wearing…or lack thereof.
MOVING ON, I found this website that is all about banning plastic bags! It might not be in the way you expect though…this particular website is mostly about how people who use reusable bags will die of E coli and lead poisoning. Well that’s not entirely true, you might also die of fecal coliform and salmonella, also, you might cause another recession if you buy reusable bags.
It has a lovely layout with lots of green and light tan, and they even replaced all the bullet points with little leaves! Its all very cute.
There’s also a truckload of “information” over the ChicoBag vs. Hilex Poly lawsuit. After looking through some of the links on their website, this one is particularly entertaining to read. It starts out with a line about the “shadowy war” that is being fought “right beneath our noses.”
Quite dramatic. Something about this article stinks, but I don’t think its that shadowy war you were talking about. It might be all those things you were saying about how reusable bags corrupt children, and how “the man” has been paying environmentalists to wage a war against plastic bags.
If you dare, you could even go look at the other articles. Lets just be clear, I’m not condoning any of these websites or articles. You could print them out if you’re short on toilet paper however. Unfortunately, I just used several blogs worth of articles to criticize. If you don’t actually want to go read those, I’m not forcing you or anything. I’ll probably end up mentioning them again anyway.
P.S. I actually went to the “about us” section of Bag the Ban, and guess what? The website is actually a movement by Hilex Poly! I thought their website got taken down because of false info they put up on it, but apparently its back! I wonder if they actually changed anything…still seems pretty absurd…just sayin….please don’t sue me for libel.
So the website I was criticizing for their crazy views on how wonderful plastic bags are was actually made by the people who manufacture those plastic bags? WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT?!